My head hurts too much to come up with a witty title...

I would like to thank you idiots of the world for this splitting headache you have cursed me with. Yeah, I’m speaking directly to you guy who felt the bike lane was an appropriate path to attempt to bypass traffic in your jimmy-rigged pick up truck. Let’s forget for a moment how dangerous and overtly selfish it was, and instead focus on the real issue – How much faster did it actually make your commute? You got two car lengths ahead and then found yourself stuck behind a parked car where you sat, cursing the two guys you’d just passed for not letting you back in line. Bravo, genius.

But it wasn’t you alone who caused this massive, throbbing ache in my head. There was also the bank teller who clearly lacked counting skills, the woman who did unspeakable things in the ladies room and the guy in front of me who took days to order his lunch. And then there was Ms. G who insisted I view vacation photo after vacation photo of her falling down wearing a teeny bikini over her much-less-than-teeny frame, and my colleague who “popped in” my office for a supposedly quick question and then spent an hour complaining he had no time to get his work done. Try talking less and working more, buddy.

Remind me again why we can’t just off all these people? I mean, we kill deer for sport and abandoned puppies when the shelters get too full, so why not people who serve no other function than to annoy?

Too far? It’s the headache. It’s taking me to a very dark place.

Thankfully I have a wonderful husband at home who listens to my woes and four ridiculous babies who love to snuggle. They keep the homicidal tendencies to a minimum and ease any pains I come home with.

Well… them and the wine.

Dr. Em